You know how you can help me out today?
How?
Don't help me.
Oh, come on, Luigi.
Let's do it like we did yesterday, huh?
Come on.
You be the famous surgeon and I'll be the nurse.
Well, what am I going to do with this girl?
All right.
Let's go.
Okay.
Ready?
Ready.
Okay.
Knife.
Knife.
Spoon.
Spoon.
Fork.
Fork.
Parmigiana cheese.
Parmigiana cheese.
Doctor, you were magnificent.
It's nothing.
You saved my brother's life.
Rosso, please don't.
Mamma, I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
I'm not sure Rosso's going to be okay.
Don't say I'm not sure, Mamma.
I'm not sure Rosso.
Stop!
Oh, Luigi.
I guess it just isn't any use.
You just don't like me.
You're always running away from me.
Oh, listen Rosso.
Look, I like a milk very much but that don't mean I'm not going to run away if a cow tries
to put its arms around my neck.
You're going to take me to that dance?
If you really like me, you'd take me to that dance?
Rosa, look, I told you I'm going to be very busy at that dance.
I've got to be there to help my teacher, Miss Spalding.
You see, I've got to be around in case of emergency and nobody asks for a dance.
That's all I hear from you.
Miss Spalding, Miss Spalding.
Sometimes I think you're in love with her.
Oh, come on now, Rosa.
Please don't be silly.
I respect her greatly due to the fact that she's the one who's teaching me the English
language is so nice.
That's all.
Rosa!
Rosa, guess what?
What, Papa?
Wait till you hear this, Mr. Stuck-up Luigi Bosco.
We don't need you to take Rosa to the dance.
A kind of Herman Schmidt just called up and asked if he could take her, and I said yes.
Herman Schmidt, the one who makes the cheapest sausages?
That's right.
Oh, Papa, I'm going to the dance?
That's right, my little flower, and with one of the biggest cheap sausage makers in all
Chicago.
I better put these on.
I've got something to wear.
Oh, I'm so excited.
She's so happy.
Bless her, Miss Spalding.
She's so happy, bless her little heart.
Mr. Spalding, did Herman Schmidt really call up to take Rosa to the dance?
That's what I said.
He called up and he begged me to let him take her.
He almost fainted on the telephone when I gave him my permission on the count of he's
crazy about my Rosa.
Crazy.
I guess he is.
You don't appreciate my Rosa because she's too good for you.
It takes a big sausage maker to appreciate my daughter Rosa.
Okay, Pashkal, okay.
He wants to take her to the dance because he's crazy about her?
That's all there is to it?
Understand?
I understand, Pashkal.
Good.
Oh, by the way, before I forget, cross off the menu every kind of meat we got and put
on sausages.
Tomorrow, we're going to have a kitchen full up with sausages.
Just what I thought.
Pashkal is a good papa.
He means all right.
Good morning, Mr. Baskal.
Hey, Mrs. Baskal.
Hello.
I just came by to see how the tickets for the dance were going.
Just great, great.
Everybody's selling tickets.
Well, that's fine.
Sit down, Mrs. Baskal.
Oh, thank you.
I just checked with the program committee and the orchestra's all set.
Good.
We're going to use Alfonso Scalopini and his five hot peppers?
No, Mr. Scalopini wanted too much money, so they've signed a contract with the...
Oh, what's the name of that band?
You know, the one where the saxophone player is a street cleaner and the piano player is
a janitor and the leader of the band is the fellow who cleans out the furnaces.
You mean the aristocrats?
Yes, yes.
That's right, the aristocrats.
That's a fine band.
Yes, fine.
Oh, one more thing, Mr. Baskal.
The committee decided that tuxedos were too formal, so all the men will wear blue suits.
Uh-oh.
Well, what's the matter?
I know where to rent a tuxedo, but where am I going to get enough money to buy a blue
suit?
Don't you have a blue suit?
The blue suit that I got, I hate to tell you how old it is.
You mean it came with you from Italy?
Miss Fogging, when I was in Ellis Island, that suit was already a citizen.
Oh, well, I wouldn't worry about it, Mr. Baskal.
If you don't have a blue suit, I'm sure that a brown one or a gray one will do.
No.
No, Miss Fogging.
If everybody's going to have a blue suit, then I got to have a blue suit.
That's all.
Because what else?
I'm going to feel out of place, like a matzo ball in a plate of minestrone.
You know what you could do, Mr. Baskal?
You have a steady job.
Why don't you open up a charge account at one of the stores?
Then you could buy a suit on credit.
No.
No, Miss Fogging.
I'm sorry.
Before I come to this country, my mama says to me, one thing, Luigi, when you buy something,
always pay with cash or money.
Or else it's going to happen to you what happened to poor Uncle Piedro.
Oh.
Three years ago, Uncle Piedro bought a goat uninstalled, you know, from the bank.
Five liters a down and two liters every month, plus the carrying charge.
Poor Uncle Piedro is still paying for the goat.
Oh, well, that's a long time and that's a lot of money.
Well, Uncle Piedro don't mind the money so much.
It's just that he's a nervous sick that the bank is going to find out that the goat is
dead.
Well, don't you have a friend you could borrow some money from?
A friend?
I mean, where are you going to find a friend who is generous and got a big heart?
Hey, don't look at my clean apron.
How about Mr. Pasquale?
I guess so.
When you can't find a friend who is generous and got a big heart, then you settle for the
other kind.
Well, good luck, Mr. Basko.
I'll see you later.
Thank you so much, Miss Fogging.
And goodbye, eh?
Goodbye.
Goodbye.
Hey, Luigi, did you take my brand new apron with the...
Ah, ah, I might have done.
Come on, take it off.
Take it off.
Is this yours?
Yes.
I didn't know this.
Oh, no.
I'll give it to you.
There you are.
Yes.
Let me put it on.
Pasquale, you look tired.
Why don't you sit down and I fix you up a nice, fresh cup of coffee, eh?
Come on, eh?
We've got to make a big fuss.
You're very comfortable.
Sit down.
Come on.
Attaboy.
Ah, ah.
Ah, ah.
I'm going to cool you off.
You feel good?
Yes.
You look wonderful.
You know, lately I've noticed that you lose a lot of weight.
You handsome dog, you.
Luigi, tell me how much money you want so I can refuse and get back to work.
Pasquale, just a second.
Papa, I'm going to die.
I'm going to lay right down and die.
Oh, Rosa.
Die.
What's the matter, baby face?
Dad.
Oh, what's the matter, baby face?
Papa, I can't go to the dance in this dress.
I just can't.
You've got to get me a new one.
A new dress?
Are you crazy?
It's the most beautiful thing I ever saw.
Boy.
Say, can't this be my little Rosa?
Hey, is this you?
Luigi, is this my daughter Rosa?
It's her.
I recognize her voice.
Papa, please.
It's much too tight.
I won't even be able to sit down in it.
Well, then don't sit down.
Lean on Herman, eh?
Right, Luigi?
Oh, Papa, please.
I've had this dress for five years.
Do you want people to say, there goes Pasquale's daughter in an old-fashioned dress?
They're going to say, boy, that Pasquale is some cheapskate.
What a tightwad.
How much cost the new dress, eh?
About $45.
Sticks and stones could break my bones, but names could never hurt me.
Papa, for the last time, are you going to buy me a new dress or not?
Rosa, for the last time, you don't need a dress.
You shouldn't have a new dress.
I'm sure you don't want a new dress, and I'm not going to buy a new dress.
Then I won't go.
I just won't go.
Rosa, Rosa, you've got to go.
The icebox is full of Herman's sausages.
Ay, girls, they think money grows on trees.
You know, they only do that to please us men, Pasquale.
Women don't need a new dress to please a man.
In the old country, my dear wife, she always ran around in potato sacks and flower bags.
And she was still pleasing to look at?
I don't know. I never looked at her.
That's the point I'm trying to bring to you.
Why don't you buy poor Rosa a dress?
Sure, you can talk with my money.
I was poor. I was generous, too.
Pasquale, look, I'm your friend, and I don't mind telling you, you are much too cheap with your money.
Sure, sure. I ought to give it away, eh?
Buy new dresses. Lend money to every Tom, Dick, and Luigi.
Don't worry about Luigi. Don't worry about Luigi.
Because I was going to borrow some money to get a blue suit for the dance, but now I'm not even going to ask you.
That's a fine, because I wasn't even going to give it to you.
No, that's good, because I'm not even going to ask.
Fine.
You know something? In America, you know, there's other ways of getting a blue suit without no money.
And that's just what I'm going to do.
And you can keep your precious money.
And I hope that the both of you can live together happily ever after.
Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
Arrivederci.
I wonder what he meant, there's other ways to get a blue suit without money.
Mamma mia! I hope I don't drive him to steal something.
Oh, no. Luigi wouldn't do a thing like that.
I don't think.
Mamma mia! I can just hear you telling me don't buy on credit.
I know I promised you, but what am I going to do?
I need a blue suit, and this is the only way I can get it.
Mamma mia, please don't fool around. Don't hold on the door, please.
Mamma mia, please, I'm telling you.
The credit office is closed from one to two.
Oh.
I'm going to go and get the blue suit.
The credit office is closed from one to two.
As a matter of fact, it's two now. It ought to be open any minute.
Oh, that's good.
It's an important matter, you know.
My name is Luigi Bosco.
Oh, how do you do? I'm Joe Healy, the store detective.
Opening up a charge account, are you?
Yes, I never had one before, you know.
But my school is going to have a dance, and I need a blue suit.
You came to the right place.
Oh, there's Mr. Whitney, the credit manager now.
Good luck.
Thank you.
Come in.
Yes, can I help you?
I'd like to open up a charge account.
Certainly, certainly. Sit right down.
Now then, have you ever had a charge account with us before?
No.
I always pay cash money when I buy.
That's why I never buy.
Yes, well, paying cash is fine, but credit is a great convenience.
Now let's just fill out this application, and we'll see what can be done.
Yes, sir.
Your name?
Bosco. Luigi Bosco. That's with a C, not a K.
Luigi Bosco.
You got a middle name?
No, just the first and the last.
We was a poor people.
Do you need a middle name?
Well, it might be important.
If we should have another Luigi Bosco, we can tell which one is you.
Oh.
Then why don't you write down Luigi with the black eyes and the dark, wavy hair, Bosco?
All right, Mr. Bosco, let's go on.
Sorry.
Are you married?
What, you got a daughter?
Yes, I have, and she's married.
Oh, that's nice. That's fine.
Is that her baby?
Yes, sir. And what a baby.
A beautiful bambino. Do you mind?
No, not at all.
It looks just like you.
Oh, you think so, Mr. Bosco?
Sure, look.
The same eyes, the same nose, same chin.
And I bet that when it's going to grow up, it's even going to have a little nose.
I bet that when it's going to grow up, it's even going to have your mustache.
It's a girl.
All right, Mr. Bosco. Now then, do you have any charge accounts anyplace?
No.
Ever since what happened to my Uncle Pietro, us Boscos always pay cash.
I see.
Aren't you going to ask me what happened to Uncle Pietro?
Definitely not.
Now, Mr. Bosco, don't you have any credit reference you can give me?
Well, uh, the free public library lets me take out the books for free.
Yes, I know. I know. But haven't you ever bought anything on credit?
No, no. No. I always live inside my income.
Hmm. That's bad.
You see, unless you bought on credit, it'll be impossible for me to get a credit rating from the credit association.
Wait a minute. You mean I have to get a charge account so that I can get the credit?
So for the charge account to get the credit, you get the ch...
Hey, I'm getting dizzy, hey.
Sorry. It sounds strange, I know. But don't worry. You'll get your charge account.
It'll just take a little longer, that's all. Say, a week or ten days.
Oh, no. By that time, the dance is going to be over.
And everybody's still laughing at Luigi Bosco, how we looked in a broken-down blue suit.
I'm sorry. I really am.
That's all right. Thank you, Mr. Whitten.
She's beautiful. And don't worry. She's not going to have a mustache.
Uh, Mr. Bosco. Yes, sir?
Just take a seat outside for a moment. I'm going to call my superior and see if I can't do something for you.
Thank you, but I mean, if it's going to be too much trouble...
No, no, no. No bother. Now, just take a seat.
All right.
It serves me right for living inside of my income, while everybody else in the country is on the outside.
After a moment, we'll return to life with Luigi.
Whether it's night school a la Luigi, or the day school that our children know,
there's no excuse for overcrowding, for out-of-date facilities,
low pay that discourages new teachers, and sometimes even dangerous fire hazards.
If this is true in your schools, your help is needed by local groups fighting for better conditions.
Join them. Don't sell tomorrow's leaders short.
Now back to life with Luigi.
Hey, Rose. Hi, Luigi. What are you doing here in the dress department?
No, I'm in the credit department, but I might just as well be someplace else.
But what are you doing here? Did Pasquale give you the money?
No, that papa of mine, he wouldn't give me any money. Oh, Luigi, I'm so unhappy.
Yeah, I'd like to assume. So what are you going to do?
You're going to enjoy yourself at the dance anyway.
Oh, no, I won't in that terrible dress. Oh, Luigi, everybody's going to laugh at me.
Rose, please. Listen, people, don't cry, please. I can't help it. I'm so miserable.
What are you going to do? Slow up. Slow up. Come on. You leak in the faster than I can mop you up.
That's enough. That's enough. You're so sweet, Luigi. Why can't my papa be more like you?
Your papa's a finer man, except with the money.
You see, your papa's just discovered that he can't take it with him.
So he wants to be with it as long as possible while he's still here.
But would he think he'd want to make his only daughter happy?
After all, who does he love better, me or his money?
Oh, you, Rose. Only he's known his money a longer time.
I can't laugh, Luigi. Every time I think of going to that dance in that terrible dress,
it just breaks my heart.
I know just how you feel. What are you going to do?
He would not even lend me the money to buy a suit.
I cannot even get one on credit before the dance. I don't know what to do.
Poor Luigi. You can't wear your old blue suit, huh?
The blue suit? Not even the moss wand?
It's a shame. I wish I could help you, Luigi.
I wish I could help you, Rose.
Thanks, Luigi. Oh, look at the time! I've got to meet Papa downstairs.
He's buying me a present so I don't feel so bad.
He's buying you a present? Yeah, a vacuum cleaner.
What are you going to do? Don't feel so bad, Rose. Come on.
You too, Luigi.
Mr. Baxco? Yes, sir.
Come into my office a moment. I have wonderful news.
Haircuts have come down in prices?
Now, how would that affect me?
No, no. It's something else. Come on in.
I've just secured permission to issue you a one-purchase credit card
so you can get your suit today. Now, what's your address, Mr. Baxco?
Mr. Ridley, you're just a wonderful man, that's all.
21 and North Halstead Street.
North Halstead. I think you can be trusted, Mr. Baxco.
Your phone? Hollycourt 9937.
I can be trusted. You can call up the library.
9937. There you are.
Now, you take that right down to men's clothing and you'll get your suit right away.
Meanwhile, I'll go ahead on your charge account.
Mr. Whitney, you know, I always think that President Eisenhower and Rocky Marciano
are the two greatest men in the whole United States.
But just now, you knock Marciano out of second place.
Thank you, Mr. Baxco. I'm honored.
Thank you so much. I'll see you later.
Bye.
Oh, hello.
Say, what's this?
Looks like you did all right for yourself. Got a temporary purchase card, huh?
That's right. $45.
Say, listen, can you tell me where I can buy the men's suits?
Fourth floor. Take the stairs to the left.
Good. Thank you.
Oh, I'm sorry, madam.
Those are the best kind. They don't talk back.
$43.98.
Rosa will like this so much.
Who's Rosa? Your wife?
No, just the opposite. She's my friend.
Oh.
$43.98.
Oh, I know this will make her so happy.
I got this to get the suit.
I'm going to get the suit.
I got a right to be happy, too.
I'm a human being.
Can't make up your mind, huh?
Mr. Healy,
clothes mean much more to a woman than they mean to a man, huh?
I'll say.
I mean, if a man has got an old suit,
people don't think nothing.
But if a girl hasn't got a nice dress, it's pretty terrible, huh?
Yeah, to her it is.
Every year my wife tells me if I don't get her a new coat for Easter, she's going to leave me.
And you get her the coat?
No, I don't.
But she makes up for it.
She leaves you?
No, she stays.
I never hear the end of it.
You see what I mean?
They just like nice clothes.
That's all. What can you do?
Do one thing.
I'm going to do it.
Going to buy a dress instead of a suit, huh?
That's right. Listen.
Where can I get a sales lady?
Oh.
Oh, Miss Burch.
Miss Burch will take care of you.
Thank you.
Yes?
Take good care of Mr. Vasco. He's a friend of mine.
Oh, thank you so much, Mr. Healy. Thank you.
That's all right.
Us victims got to stick together.
Yeah.
What kind of a dress would you like?
I like this dress over here.
Oh, that's a lovely one.
What size does the young lady take?
Size?
10, 12, 14, 16.
If you go by 10s, you get there much faster.
Now, look. Maybe you can tell by me.
I wear size 38, and she is three times me.
I'm afraid that won't do us much good, Mr. Vasco.
Men's sizes are different from women's.
Why?
Well, they're different.
Men and women...
Please.
There are some things you don't have to explain.
If you could just give me some idea.
I'll show you. Wait a minute.
She's, um...
She's bigger than this girl.
Uh-huh. How much bigger?
I'll show you. Wait.
You see, I danced with roses to find out.
Now, that's not a rose, you know.
That's not a rose, you know.
No, that's not a rose. No.
That's a rose!
I see. I think a size 50 would be just about right.
Now, wait a minute.
That's fine. Here.
That'll be $43.98, with tax.
Sales merchandise is not returnable, you know.
Yes, I know.
This is going to be your charge.
Here's my credit card.
All right.
I think the young lady will be very happy with this dress.
I suggest she wear a corsage with it.
Well, she better.
If she don't wear a corsage, she's never going to fit into this.
Just let me know how she likes it.
I'll write this up for you now.
Thank you.
Oh, wait a minute, Mr. Barto!
What's wrong, Miss Burch?
Your friend forgot his credit card.
Oh.
Well, I'll take it. I'll give him a call when I go off duty tonight.
What a character!
Hello?
Pasquale Spaghetti Palace? Pasquale speaking.
Yes, yes, Luigi Pasquale, you're working here, but he's not in the now.
I tell him to call you, eh? Who's this?
Who's this? Mamma mia!
Store detective.
Hello. What he did, eh?
Hello, hello.
He hang up.
He did it.
Shoplifted a blue suit.
That little pup squeak, I'm going to kill him.
I'm going to break him in two like a breadstick.
I'll cut your throat like a chicken.
Hello, Pasquale.
Hello. There you are, you big little crook, you.
What's the matter with you?
You flipping off your lid?
How could you do a thing like this to me?
When I got such a good reputation for being honest all these years.
Now you bring a shame down on my head, eh?
Marcus, I didn't say.
Yeah, I know.
I heard about what you did just now.
You went to the store and you stole a blue suit.
The storekeeper's detective told me.
What?
Yes, I know all about it, eh?
Now, what about it?
No, no, no, no, no, no, I didn't steal a no suit.
I'm going to call and turn.
No, I won't turn you over to the police.
I love you like my own son.
I told you I didn't steal a no suit.
This is no suit.
No suit.
No suit.
No.
This is a dress that I buy for Rosa.
Because a stingy papa wouldn't buy her one.
I got this on credit.
Luigi, a dress.
You got a head like a cabbage.
What's the matter?
You're mad because somebody's nicer to your daughter instead of her own papa?
I gave Rosa the money to buy the dress when I met her in the store
because she was crying all over the vacuum cleaners.
You gave her the money to Rosa?
Si.
And I can't return the dress and now she's got two dresses and I still don't got a blue suit.
Man, she made cosa como sucedera a mi.
Serve you right for being so foolish.
If you would have listened to me, you would...
Papa!
Luigi!
Oh, wait a minute.
See what I've got.
We know.
Look what Luigi got.
Oh, Luigi.
The dress.
It's beautiful.
Now you got two dresses and this dope don't even got one blue suit.
He's no dope.
Oh, don't tell me.
I love him like my own son.
But still I say he's a dope.
If he was a dope, would I have bought him this?
Look, Luigi.
Why me?
I couldn't stand to see you going to the dance in no blue suit.
Rosa.
That's for this and that's for this.
Luigi, this suit has two pair of pants.
Luigi, this suit has two pair of pants.
Luigi and Pasquale will be back in a moment.
The Racket Squad will be along later tonight on most of these same stations
with the thrilling inside story of police action against swindlers.
Every other Thursday, CBS Television invites you to observe at first hand
how swindlers victimize the public.
For your own protection, watch The Racket Squad tonight
and whenever this authoritative program comes to your channel.
And now back to Luigi and Pasquale.
Thank you so much for the compliment, Miss Harvey.
You dance pretty good yourself.
You dance so divinely.
Let it out. Let it out.
Stop playing in the sweeper.
I'm a sweeper, all right.
I'm just practicing how to dance for tomorrow night's dance.
You stop practicing with Mrs. Spalding because you're going to take a Rosa.
Herman Schmidt has the flu.
But, but, Pasquale.
But, say no buts.
Where are you going?
If I'm going to take a Rosa to the dance, then I'm going to the kitchen.
I'm dancing with the refrigerator.
I'm going to the kitchen.
Thank you.
Also appearing in tonight's cast were Frank Katie, Herb Bygren, and Eve McVay.
Be sure to join us again at this same time next week for another warm and gay half hour with Luigi and his friends.
Life with Luigi is a CBS Network television production.
Enjoy Four Star Playhouse on the CBS Television Network.